was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
