Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
