There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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