She said her name was "party"
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
