Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
