it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
