it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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