it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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