I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize