the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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