mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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