i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
