I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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