she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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