big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
