Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
