I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize