Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
