Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize
