If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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