You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
