I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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