is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
