It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I have demons in me.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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