My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
