God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
