Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
