Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!

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(217): View more from Illinois

Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(732): View more from New Jersey

i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar

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(805): View more from California

do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?

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(740): View more from Ohio

id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.

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(512): View more from Texas

Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.

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(913): View more from Kansas

My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!

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