i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Sext me about skeletons
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance