My liver just broke up with me...
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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