took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize