What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
