So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
