the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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