check it out our google latitudes are spooning
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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