Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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