It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
