I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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