Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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