Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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