Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
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