Its about making memories worth repressing
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Everything about him screamed your future.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize