Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
