bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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