I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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