O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize