I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize