I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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