Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
