Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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