I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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